Unforgiveness may not be in the dictionary, but it’s in my heart. It does not define me, but it shapes me. If you are honest, it is a part of you. Maybe a big part. In a perfect world you would never get hurt or hurt others, but you don’t live in that world. Wounds are part of our imperfect existence. Our deepest wounds usually come from our deepest relationships. So what do we do with those wounds? Often, forgiveness is in our vocabulary, but not in our soul.
We refuse to forgive the one who wounded us, believing that we are locking them in a prison of penance. We want them to pay for what they have done. The truth is that we do not hold that kind of power over someone else. Instead of shaping the other person, our choices shape us. We wake up one day to the realization that we are the ones imprisoned. Our refusal to forgive has trapped us in a bitter cage.
You may not have the power to imprison others, but you possess the key to unlocking your cell. Choose forgiveness. Destroy your prison. Set yourself free.
“Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.” -Mark Twain